Archive | July, 2010

To snack or not to snack?

28 Jul

I hate hunger; the empty, gnawing feeling that I constantly have.  This, of course, could explain why I am 45 lbs overweight.     Given that I have pledged not to eat processed food, I find snacking the hardest thing both to do and not to do.

Here is my current hit list of snacks (not all are great choices):

Carrots, Activia, Edy’s Popsicles, Almonds, A spoonful of peanut butter and that is about it.     Yes, I realize that apples, bananas and other fruits should be on this list and probably will be shortly – however, is this it?  What are some other healthy options?  Why am I having such a brain fart about this?


The Land of So-So – Day 6

27 Jul

One pound less today – always good.  Yet – the reality is that we all have normal weight fluctuations and a pound is within that;  I am not breaking out the champagne yet (193, perhaps, 192 – now, we are in business).  It is amazing how little numbers can dictate happiness – money in our bank account, lbs on a scale.   I need to move beyond this.

Today was not a productive work day.  No writing for me.  Bad.  With my newborn in tow I have determined that I only have about 2 hours of so of productive, work related time.  The rest is devoted to feedings, diaper changes, cleaning, and all that jazz.    So today I elected to use that time and go see the movie SALT.  The verdict? Disappointing.   A pet peeve of mine is when I feel a movie is primarily being shown to lay the foundation for following sequels.  The ending, as you can imagine, didn’t satisfy. And Angelina does not look good as a blonde (oops, broke another of my rules).  Segway into the daily sins:

Had one Diet Coke – went out to eat (had a salad), hadn’t had a Diet Coke for a number of days.  Don’t feel to bad about this.   Had a small piece of cake (no frosting 200 calories), and a glass of wine.

Consistency and working were my bigger issues.   Gossip websites were frequented much too much; bed, floss, face, laundry, picking up, nothing much happened.

I also didn’t work out.  In my defense, I hurt my knee on the Sunday run.   This has never happened before.  I don’t know whether to blame my gait, the extra weight or the fact that my joints are probably still funky from giving birth.

Tomorrow is a new day, tomorrow I can start fresh again.  This will be what I am muttering to myself when I go to sleep tonight.  A sleep aided by red wine:)

Recording Weight Online…

27 Jul

A report on cnn ( found that people are more successful if they record their weight, food, etc. (essentially on something like sparkpeople, fitday, etc.) online.   So is this true for a blog?  – let me tell you, seeing photos of myself posted online for the world to see is one hell of a wake-up call, cold shower, fire under me, [insert other motivational start-up phrase here] ….

Keeping the Dream Alive

27 Jul

Check out this article on –

$40 turns into 200 million – makes you rethink what you put into a garage sale.  I hope that the people that sold the Ansel Adams slides – don’t find out about this… How depressing!

Making Progress – Day 5

26 Jul

Today (Sunday) was pretty good – all things considered.   The weather was wondrous –  especially after the tropical heat we have had.   So today, instead of running, I opted to ride my bike – Amy.   Amy is a Giant Avail 2010.   She is cute too – white, with a little gray and light blue trim.  Here is a pic.

My Amy - Isn't she pretty?

Biking is truly an uplifting experience.  It is challenging – yet at the same time it allows you to appreciate your surroundings.  I find myself enjoying the scenery – the color of the sky, the flowers by the road, a roadside stand, signs…. you are present in the moment – physically and mentally.   Today’s ride was great.  The only problem was that my memory of riding (prior to pregnancy) was with me – leaving me surprised with how hard the climbs were and how awkward the bike felt with my new girth.   God bless the riders on the Tour de France.   Only when you ride do you begin to have an inkling of what they are going through.

Things that didn’t happen:

– I had a kids size ice cream…we had guests over and I was starving.   Beyond that I was good:) Happy Day.

Reality Check – Day 4

26 Jul

I weighed myself (it had been two weeks since I did) and took pictures… I am still alive, however my jaw is still on the ground (195.2 at 5ft. 8).  Pictures will be posted shortly for everyone’s viewing pleasure.  I plan to do this each Monday.

I am, without a doubt, beyond the “she’s a little chunky” phase.  I am fat and no, not the Phat kind.   This should be no surprise to me, given that my mother-in-law, made the fat cliche, dreaded comment this past week – “you have such a pretty face.” Yet, I continued to pretend that my height allowed me to carry my weight more than it did.     I think what surprised me the most is how big my butt and stomach are now.   Also, what is frustrating to me is that despite my bad weekend – that I was, for the two weeks prior, pretty good – cut down on food, diet coke, exercised, and still no progress on the scale.    I have been eating the same thing for breakfast and lunch most days (english muffin with a little peanut butter and an Activia; lunch is a salad with 3 pieces of lunchmeat ham, olive oil/vinegar, 1/4 cup threaded cheese and 1/8 cup almonds)

Something else that I need to acknowledge here is that I am breastfeeding.  And while some women seem to drop weight as quickly as Mel Gibson’s career is declining – that doesn’t seem to be the case with me.  I feel like my body is holding on to it for dear life – it does not recognize that there is at least 45 extra lbs it can use – let it go, let it go…. Also, if I read another post on how weight just falls off when you breast feed, I will vomit.    Ladies, everyone is different and losing weight easily is not a gift that I received from God.  Apparently, he made me for cold, Arctic weather where food is scarce – hence my wondrous ability to hold onto it and look my best in a large winter coat.  I mention breastfeeding because I can’t get crazy about not eating and I am also exercising.    Now, I don’t buy into the whole – you get an extra 500 calories a day from breastfeeding – however,  something would be nice.

Getting Back – Day 3

26 Jul

I was good on Sunday.   No Diet Coke, no processed food (except pita chips) – not too shabby.  And most importantly, I didn’t eat after 8.

Exercise also happened – I ran 2.4 miles, very slowly, but it happened.  There is hope for me yet.  Kitchen not clean when I went to bed though….