Beware: The following post is a little whiney and winey (I have two glasses in me….the shame…)
Today I ran……poorly. Ok, so in all honesty my performance 33.45 (5K) is pretty much what I have always done at a 5K race, tri, etc. Yet, what concerns me is that it was hard. It was only 3 miles – this is below my base run – however, it seemed to be a struggle. To be frank, I also felt like a loser (I despise that word and hate thinking of others this way – yet it is the only thing that applies to me today). Everyone was faster than me. The race was advertised as a run/walk – yet where were the walkers to boost my self esteem? I am really not that shallow – but seriously, I didn’t think I would be at the complete back of the pack. I signed on for a reality check on my training and a reality check is certainly what I got. For some reason I think I got cocky training – and elevated myself to the land of pretty, thin people that are able to get fast times of 8 and 9 minute miles. I forget that I am still pretty overweight and a rather large person in this race – I still hold onto what I looked like a decade ago….What have I gotten myself into? Why did I sign up for a full tri? I have such a long way to go. To date, I have only concentrated on whether I could do it – could I do 22 miles on a bike (yes), 6.6 miles running (yes) – Speed, combining these components is not something I have spent a lot of time on – and I need to.
Besides desperately needing to work on speed my other confession is I just started swimming this week (less than a month before my sprint tri) and two months before the full tri. I live on a lake – directly on water – yet I couldn’t seem to get myself into the water. I didn’t get in my lake water in July besides my dr. didn’t want me to – my c-section scar was healing and the lake is not a clean place. And in August – it just seemed too “icky”. After swimming twice this week (in the clean chlorinated pool at work) – I realized – wow this is harder than I thought/remembered. Which is the theme for the week I fear – it is harder than I thought.
Enough of this pity party. Tomorrow and here on out I will work on speed. My new running partner will help with speed and my brick workouts will assist in endurance. I hope:)
On another front – sorry I haven’t visited many of your blogs. I am really struggling with going back to work, finding time to breathe, workout, feed my children and showering. Yea, not pretty. I even haven’t had time to respond to a fabulous award that mostly fit mom gave me. That is on tomorrow’s to do list.
Good night.
45 before 35 
It seems like you were meant to feel crappy doing that race. Look how much it has made you realize you need to work on for your upcoming Tris! Keep at it, and you’ll complete them no problem. Work even harder and you’ll have a time you’ll be proud of too!
You are right – and really that is why I signed up for it. To get perspective and to motivate me. I am motivated!
On of my my favorite quotes is “don’t look at what you have or have not been able to do, but instead focus on how much you can get accomplished…”
You will do great at your upcoming tri. And truthfully, the fact that you will finish it is already ahead of most people 🙂
Good luck balancing it all – work, kids, atheletics, etc. You are setting a great example for your family 🙂
Ya know, some days your workout is super-fantastic and other days it kinda sucks. I wish they could be super-fantastic EVERY time, but we all have “off” days once in awhile and that’s okay. That’s also why rest days are so important and rejuvenating. LOVE me my rest days!
You’re doing GREAT!
Wow! You have a lot going on. It’s super impressive that you’re training for a race, starting back at work, etc. I hope you get some rest this weekend.
Trying to balance everything is really, REALLY hard. Keep focusing on your priorities and the most important stuff WILL get done. As for speed, well, I’m really slow, so I’ve got nothing for ya there, but I know you’ll do your best and push hard! For me, “racing” is about the training and about committing to staying active, no matter what. It sounds like you’re still very motivated, and that’s great! Hang in there. Not every race or workout will be great, but you are making progress!
Most of the time I am good with my slow speed…but sometimes (i.e. the race)…it hurts a little. And speed is not why I am doing this. I am doing this – for the same reasons you are doing it – to move, to impress myself, to be a good role model for my kids and …to lose weight:)
Hi from a new visitor via mostlyfitmom. During my run on Thurs I kept telling myself “all runs can’t be great.” It was just a blah run. BTW, reading all that you accomplish it’s easy for the rest of us to see you’re no loser.
Happy to have found your blog.
Depending on the day I can have great workouts or really crummy ones. We’ve all had “bad” races and good ones, it just happens. Take this is a learning experience (which it seems like you are) and just keep moving forward with your training. 🙂